WITH MARSHALL'S bizarre first-week open week, I sat glued to the couch.
And sat and sat and sat. Watched a few games with MU implications, and here are some takeaways. (Or overreactions, you may say.)
Southern Mississippi is the favorite in Conference USA: It wasn't just that the Golden Eagles defeated Kentucky 44-35, or that they beat a supposed "Power 5" team. After all, I've been picking on the Wildcats for years.
It was the way the Eagles overpowered the Wildcats in wiping out a 35-10 deficit. It was the second-most jaw-dropping performance of the week, in my world.
(No, Hattiesburg, you're not "Southern Miss" on first reference. I always check the front of campus when I go there, just to see if there is a name change.)
When JoJo Kemp's 7-yard run gave the Wildcats a 35-10 with 56 seconds left in the first half, Southern Miss star QB Nick Mullens had thrown three interceptions. UK owned a 443-190 lead in total yards, and had 10 double-digit yardage plays. Drew Barker's four touchdown passes were 72, 43, 9 and 53 yards.
Yikes!
But when Mullens lulled UK's secondary to sleep and burned it with a 71-yard TD pass to Isaiah Jones, you wondered if something might be up. It certainly was.
When the Eagles got done, they had scored on seven possessions in a row, none on short fields. From the time of their 25-point deficit, George Payne and Ito Smith bowled over the Wildcats for 149 rushing yards and Mullens threw for 181 of his 258 yards.
The total-yardage gap in the final 30:26 was 364-0 in favor of the Eagles.
They turned Kentucky into Kentucky State. It was that impressive.
Is Louisville that good or is Charlotte still that bad?: The answer is "yes."
As the Cardinals pinballed the 49ers 70-14, quarterback Lamar Jackson looked every bit the stud he is made out to be. Marshall should keep him under 405 total yards and eight combined touchdowns (right?), but he'll be the best QB at Joan C. Edwards since West Virginia's Pat White.
Jackson is worth the price of admission.
All hail James Conner: Pittsburgh shook off Villanova 28-7, but the story was Conner scoring two touchdowns in an emotional comeback.
Conner, the 2014 Atlantic Coast Conference player of the year, was diagnosed with Hodgkin's lymphoma last November, but even participated in spring drills wearing a mask to protect his depleted immune system. He stiff-armed a defender on his first TD, showing he has regained most or all of his strength.
The Herd plays at Pitt on Oct. 1, but fans can get a peek at the Panthers at noon Saturday as their rivalry with Penn State is renewed for the first time since 2000.
I could quarterback Western Kentucky: OK, I'm getting full of myself. Mike White can play, and 517 passing yards in his debut shows as much. I can't throw to the opposite hashmark.
But behind an ultra-veteran front line, White was not sacked and may not have been touched. Nicholas Norris and Taywan Taylor combined for 312 yards on 12 catches, blowing through a two-step-slow Rice secondary and giving White some gimme targets.
The Hilltoppers will be OK, even with a visit to Alabama this week.
I'm almost impressed with Florida International: The Panthers led Indiana 13-12 after three quarters and got waylaid in the fourth. The final was 34-13.
The score may be misleading. The Hoosiers moved into FIU territory seven of their first eight possessions before scoring on drives of 74 and 80 yards. FIU's Alex McGough threw three interceptions, two going for Indiana TDs.
The crowd was typical FIU despite a bigger-name opponent. Maryland comes to Miami on Friday, with the first 10,000 fans getting "White Out" T-shirts.
The surplus may last until Marshall's Nov. 19 visit.
North Texas is still the Lean Green: Touchdowns of 49, 88 and 46 yards helped NT fall 34-21 in the Metroplex pillow fight with Southern Methodist. A late Mean Green TD makes this closer than it really was.
Semi-ballyhooed QB Alec Morris went 24 of 39 for 237 yards and two TDs, but threw three to the Mustangs.
Give the Coogs a promotion: Big 12 schools are gutless if they don't invite Houston. Speaking of the week's biggest jaw-dropper, the Cougars didn't just beat Oklahoma, they beat the Sooners handily. The 33-23 final score is misleading, as the Sooners scored with 2:05 left and couldn't recover the onside kick.
Despite denials, it was The Grand Audition, and the Cougars aced it. The former Southwest Conference school has a nice new stadium and will help bump up TV numbers in an otherwise difficult market.
The Big 12 not only should invite Houston, it should split coach Tom Herman's resulting $5 million bonus. But getting 10 college presidents in the same room is always dangerous.
For all we know, they'll vote for Tulane and Southern Methodist in some weird compromise.
Marshall plays this week: This space next week will be devoted to the Thundering Herd, who finally gets to play somebody. Morgan State at 6 p.m. Saturday, if you forgot.
Can't get here soon enough.